Tutor profile: Emma F.
Est-ce que le gouvernement devrait permettre les Organismes Génétiquement Modifiés en France? (Should the government allow GMOs in France?)
An introduction paragraph: Pendant la dernière décennie, il y avait un débat à propos de la santé et la securité des OGM (organismes génétiquement modifiés). L’étude qui a commencé ce débat, c’était l’étude de Gilles-Eric Séralini en 2012. Cette étude a changé la perception des OGM autour du monde parce qu’elle a découvert le lien entre le maïs de Monsanto et le cancer. Même si qu’il y a une vraie risque du cancer avec les OGM, le Conseil d’État en France a suggéré que la France annule “l’interdiction du maïs OGM...MON810” le mars 2016. Cependant, il faut que la France garder l’interdiction du maïs OGM pour la santé du peuple. Si les OGM sont permis en France, les grandes sociétés comme Monsanto gagneront plus de pouvoir, et les gens souffriront de maladies et seront en mauvaise santé.
Is Shakespeare's "Othello" really about Iago? Why or why not?
An introduction paragraph: In Shakespeare’s "Othello", Iago portrays a character who values power and authority above all else, yet is insecure and jealous in his career position and as a husband. However, Iago’s self-control, dishonesty, and great skill to judge situations allow him to manipulate the other characters in order to improve his own position. Because of this manipulation, Othello, who begins as confident and loving, stops being an autonomous character to the point where he even exhibits Iago’s characteristics more than his own. In this way, even the actions carried out by Othello could be seen as Iago’s doing. In fact, due to his manipulative abilities, Iago is responsible for the arrangement of the entire plot, showing the drastic effects of jealousy, insecurity, and power on human behavior.
Subject: College Admissions
Rather than a question, I have provided a sample college essay along with my general suggestions and guidance in the answer. Along with the general information provided in the answer, I would also provide specific advice regarding grammar, sentence structure, and vocabulary in a real case. This essay is not my intellectual property and was adapted from an example CollegeVine essay. Prompt: Tell us about a time you fell in love… with an academic concept. What excited you about this idea, project, or lesson? Word Count Limit: 300 words Essay Four nitrogenous bases create 64 codons that translate into 20 amino acids. These amino acids create numerous genotypes that define every aspect of life from eye color to the presence of a recessively inherited genetic disorder. Genetics would certainly be easier to understand if the simple presence of a dominant allele could prevent a disease or make a child grow to be 6 feet tall. However, the combination of multiple genotypes can affect how a phenotype is expressed, and thus, the overall health of a person. For example, sickle-cell disease leads to deformed red blood cells that clog small blood vessels, causing physical weakness, pain and organ damage. A diagnosis of this disease may seem outwardly negative; however, in African-Americans, a single copy of the sickle-cell allele reduces the frequency of malaria attacks. The severity of Huntington’s chorea depends on how many times the genetic sequence CAG is repeated–39 times or more indicates a life waiting for the slow deterioration of organs and physical functions. Every biology textbook attributes the attraction between two people, genetic recombination, and genetic mutations to sheer happenstance. It is astonishing that something so uncertain is responsible for the genetic diversity that ensures the survival of the human population. I fell in love with the juxtaposition of uncertainty and specificity in molecular and macro genetics. There is no one way to explain each genetic characteristic–no one way to map the human genome. The effect of any given genotype cannot be measured.
Strengths: You have a very clear passion for the subject of genetics. I like your description of the “juxtaposition of uncertainty and specificity” in genetics. The awe that this complex system of uncertainty produces is a great way to explain your love for an academic concept. Suggestions: This essay recites information more than it responds to the prompt. While your knowledge of genetics showed that you are passionate about the subject, it does not demonstrate why you are passionate or how you came to be passionate. Towards the end of your essay, you admire the uncertainty and randomness of genetics–how can you expand on that? Consider the following: What do you find appealing about the uncertainty and specificity in genetics? Are you driven to debunk the mystery, or are you content to admire this miracle of nature? What led you to become interested in genetics? Was it a class? A teacher? An experience? What was this learning experience like for you? When did you realize you had fallen in love with genetics? Overall, I would suggest that you omit the majority of the information you included in the first paragraph (except the first sentences, they work well as a hook) and replace it with an explanation of your appreciation for the uncertainty and complexity of genetics. Then, I would recount an experience that led you to feel inspired/excited about genetics. To conclude, I would relate this appreciation of uncertainty to your outlook on life in general.
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